I Heart Knitters

I swear I have gushed about knitters and those I work with so many times on Twitter, my podcast and this blog that I am becoming a broken record but I mean it: knitters and crafters are amazing. 

It's not really that big a secret that the last month has been hell on toast between buying a house, the last minute negotiations (and the tantrums of those we're buying from), the packing, the organising and the ENDLESS, endless hospital trips for me. I am not known for crying unless I'm angry but I was at that point where I'd hit my limit and was gulping big sobs on the phone to my sister who was alarmed to say the least. She knows that if I'm crying and not fighting anymore, things are bad indeed. 

I have flinched everytime someone has asked 'Are you excited about your new house?' or I bet you're nesting right?' Each time it was a heavy reminder that I should be excitedly preparing a family home for the soon to arrive Playful Baby and yet I wasn't. I felt so worn down. 

But then knitters happened. 

I work with designers, yarnies, tech editors and other such wonderful people. My podcast and blog have connected me to a community I respect, admire and adore and they brought me back into a happy space through their love and contact. Over the last few weeks I've been fortunate enough to have a trickle of mother and baby presents that brought a tear to my eye for all the right reasons. 

Knitters and crafty types understand the love and care that goes into creating a finished object and that's why each item I'm about to share means the world to the giant and I. They were created by wonderful friends who I am connected to simply through knitting. I understand the thoughts that poured into them as they were worked and when my little one is wrapped in them, I will know that they are the luckiest baby in the world because they are wrapped in the love of knitters and crafters. That beats all the crap of the last few months hands down and I wanted to share the power of handmade gifts with you too. 

I won't name gift givers as it feels that I then remove the personal touch with which they were gifted but I will say that as knitting aunties go, Playful Baby is one blessed child and I for one hope to keep these ladies in my life for years to come. Thank you xxx

Wait? What?!?!

One of the things that I've enjoyed most about this blog is the space to share things I care a lot about. A lot of the blog as a result has been knitting, crafting and food related. These are my everyday experiences, things I now make a living out of and that keep me ticking. This is after all a playful blog and these are the things that keep me playful.

Tucked into this blog though have been posts about issues I care passionately about, politics and women's rights. These too are a huge part of who I am and I would be lying if I said they're not the kind of thing that I talk about daily. It really is very normal for me to talk about an issue such as gender stereotypes on an average day.

It's why when I discovered that I was pregnant I was faced with a slight dilemma. I loathe oversharing and I am very icky about sharing my personal life. Small snippets, yes.... a child? No. It's just not for me. The internet is a vast and huge presence and I like the inner sanctum of my personal relationships and soon to be family. 

However, as I experience my pregnancy and society's expectations of how a woman and her partner should behave, I have felt a growing need to share some of these experiences. I don't want to share gross out stories or wax lyrical about the joys of motherhood (hello, I'm only just entering my 5th month??) but I do want to voice some of the things I'm experiencing.

For example, our first maternity appointment started something like this:

Midwife: Come in! Mum, why don't you sit here and your husband can sit there?

Me: We may be in for a mighty long wait if you're waiting for my husband. 

I mean, really?!? In this day and age? I'm also stunned by the lack of mixed race couples portrayed in any literature about pregnancy and the complete lack of advice if you do not have a partner. As for same sex couples, they are thoughtfully bracketed under 'partners' while the rest of the sentence constantly refers to your partner as 'he'. 

In an effort to carve out a safe space for me and prepare for the birth, I took a pregnancy yoga class where the teacher actually said 'ladies, imagine your bundle of joy is in your arms and glow' before crooning on, 'of course, boys never sit still but some of you might be lucky enough to have a little girl'. In fear of howling in frustration during the meditation I promptly walked out. 

But luckily, there is a ray of sunshine in my week and I'm going to write about it soon as it has reminded me that I don't have to buy into this stereotyped drivel. Until then, I couldn't help but share my ever growing list of comedy fails. I can't call them anything else, it's too terrifying otherwise.

Youth fading

 

This week's You Capture struck an instant chord: Youth. I sighed, I had a milestone birthday, it seemed I was fated to write one of those reflective posts I love from other bloggers about where I am in life right now. 

I have no idea. Really. I hit 21 with optimism and a world full of possibilities: I had time to make mistakes. Now at 30 it seems a little less free. Words like mortgages, career goals, work-life balance have entered my vocabulary. There's also the alarming amount of friends married or having children. I've never had that as a goal so I remain confused but seeing them all doing it sure makes you ponder.

Why is it that we hit birthdays and decide 'I had to be HERE by NOW'? I was never going to be married to Colin Firth, even I knew it was a whimsy but still, there were a few things I'd like to have knocked out the park by now. To be honest, lately, life has kind of kicked my ass and I'm not entirely sure I'm ready for my 30s. Shouldn't I be done with hangups and lack of confidence by now? I look at girls in the bars in their early 20s and think 'Slow down girly, you have so much to enjoy. Lay back, enjoy the ride.' So I know I must have dropped some of that. But still, I'm not exactly reaching for the stars or hitting my stride yet. I kind of hoped I would be.

So do I make resolutions? Goals? Reinvent myself? Nope. I make more tea and watch the pretty cat dancing in the sunshine over there by the stunning cherry blossoms and think about laundry and going to pilates at long last. 

I never did make it to dance this week.....